The dating extravaganza is over and it went as well as one would expect.
Before I get to the gritty details, I have a couple of news item to report.
First: I have adopted two cats. Many people see this as a bad thing from the single girl perspective. I am now just one cat away from being "the cat lady," relegated to the single life for the rest of my days surrounded only by furry friends.
I, however, have a different view. My friend that I adopted them from had to give them up because her very serious boyfriend/soon-to-be fiancee is very allergic to cats and they had to go. She met this man very soon after she got the cats. Ergo they are lucky cats and will help not hurt me. Plus it's nice to have some furry companions; chore time was so much more fun today than usual because of the cat's antics. Even now, one of them is curled up next to me as I write.
Second: I spoke with the IJL dating director and told him how displeased I am. I compared his lack of communication after I was stood up to the sentinel event of the dating service. I told him how disappointed I have been in the dates. It felt good to be honest and he assured me that it will get better....we'll see about that. Being back on Match has confirmed to me that I pick much better dates for myself than they do.
Anyways, back to Saturday.
My three dates were coffee, lunch, and dinner. My good friend and fashionista prescribed the outfit for the day: skinny jeans, tank top, boyfriend cardigan, and gladiator sandals. Then, she reasoned, after the first two dates I could throw on a nice shirt over the tank top and swap out gladiator sandals for cage heels and I'd be good to go for the evening. I was also instructed to straighten my hair for the day.
So I got up, took a shower, straightened my hair, put on make-up, and ran to the mall to get said skinny jeans. Unfortunately, the traffic was very bad, and I was late to coffee. Really late. Like 25 minutes late. I felt bad because I am not the kind of person to show up late like that on the first meeting. However, on the flip side, I decided it is a good test to see how someone reacts-make them mad from the beginning and see if a temper rears its ugly head.
Fortunately, Mr. Coffee passed the test and was very gracious. We had a good coffee. He was cute, easy to talk to, and we have some common interests. It came up in our discussion that he is divorced. I have never given much thought to whether or not I would date a divorced person; on one hand it seems that there would be a lot of baggage, but on the other hand, if someone has been married before and it didn't work out then I would hope that he would have good perspective on what he is looking for and what is really important to make a relationship work. He said that he wants to see me again so we will see if there is a date #2 and what it will bring. Religion didn't come up at all so that is something I need to figure out.
Directly after that date, I drove to meet Mr. Lunch. I was excited to meet Mr. Lunch because he has a very interesting profile. I knew going in that we have similar tastes, he is well-traveled, and he is funny. That being said, I think that going into the first meeting with expectations is dangerous. So I was trying to be excited to meet him without having expectations about how we would get along.
We had a really good lunch. One of the first things I noticed about him is that he is very serious person. Of course he is an engineer so he is a precise individual and definitely a planner. I value these characteristics because I am neither precise nor a planner, and I feel that my ideal partner would have these qualities. Someone has to make sure that the bills are paid, the retirement plan is on track, and the house isn't falling down, and I'd rather not be that person. We have similar tastes and our conversation was easy. He has already texted me for a second date and I am looking forward to seeing him again.
He is also very intriguing. He told me that he is going to Germany next month to pick up his BMW. Apparently, there is a deal that the German board of tourism gives to anyone who will pick up their BMW in Germany; you get discounted air fare, discounted accommodations while in Germany, you get to drive your car in Germany for 2 weeks, and you get to keep the temporary German license plate once your car is shipped back to the US. While this is cool and interesting, he is not snobby-he asked BMW if they could take their insignia off the car because he doesn't want people to know that his car is a BMW. He just may turn out to be a Square John. Time will tell.
After Mr. Lunch, I had a little bit of down time to prepare for Mr. Dinner. I decided to watch the Netflix DVD that came this week for a minute while I was home, and it is a good thing I did because it was the first disk of the first season of "The Big Bang Theory," and Mr. Dinner asked me if I had ever seen the show. Talk about good timing.
It's hard to describe the setting of this date. IJL picks the restaurant so I would like to take this moment to make it quite clear that I had nothing to do with the picking of this location. It was a hotel restaurant. Not all hotel restaurants are bad, but this one was horrible. Bad carpet with weird designs, bad lighting, bad menu, bad food-everything about the restaurant was bad.
When I first saw Mr. Dinner, he was wearing a Huxtable-esque sweater. That's right-Saturday night and he is wearing a sweater that his grandmother could have given him for his 15th birthday. I was wearing the afore mentioned skinny jeans, nice shirt and cage heels. The whole thing was awkward.
If there is one thing that I think I am pretty good at, it is being able to converse fairly easily with almost anyone. Not so with this guy-he is incredibly intelligent, but a really bad conversationalist. At first, conversation was a bit like pulling teeth. By the end of the night, through hard work and patience, I discovered that he is taking helicopter flying lessons, has a maid who comes twice weekly, volunteers at a horse shelter, and is in possession of a Darth Vader plush toy. He asked me if I have any nerdish tendencies-I think he was hoping that I am a closet chemist or Trekkie or Halo 3 world champion. He didn't seem thrilled with my answer that I like crossword puzzles. Even though it was fairly awkward, I may go out with him again. He seemed like a nice person and his personality struck me as the kind that takes more than one date to get to know/figure out.
To end out the evening, I met some friends at a bar where our mutual friend was playing in the jazz band. It was a great way to decompress and laugh about the day. I am so grateful for friends, and the support that they give me. I am grateful that I had the opportunity to meet three people in one day. I am grateful that I actually stepped out of my comfort zone and did it. And I am grateful that it went pretty well.
All of this dating is teaching me lessons. When I dated in the past, I never would have dreamed of asking a guy out. But now, if I see someone that I am interested in getting to know on Match, I don't hesitate to send an e-mail. I am learning what I am looking for, and I am learning to go get it when I see it. When I meet Mr. Right, I will not let him pass me by.
No comments:
Post a Comment