The battle for everything

Hello friends

I am finally feeling a little better; at least well enough to rejoin society. It's really nice to have my voice back.

This week has been somewhat productive on the dating front.

I had a second date with Mr. Coffee. We spent 4+ hours together and it went well. We had good conversation (he now writes about gold and oil), we talked about religion a little, we laughed about various absurdities. Overall a fun time and I would like to see him again. I think he'll call me...we will see.

The chronic e-mailer I posted about last time sent me yet another generic e-mail so I finally bit the bullet and asked him out for drinks. He sent me a very confusing reply. Something about how he joined match prematurely and he wanted to take it easy before jumping back into things and he wanted to continue e-mailing me. I don't get it-why join match if you don't want to meet people? I thought that was the whole point. It makes me think he is already in a relationship and wants to keep me in his back pocket for a rainy day. No thanks Mr. e-mail. I wrote him back and told him if he ever wants to meet, contact me, but I am not interested in being the random girl he e-mails when he is bored.

I am meeting up with Mr. Give-it-another-try tomorrow. I am looking forward to it and will report back with details.

Here is something that I am pondering tonight: how do you balance letting a man take the lead vs. getting to do things that you actually want to do?

I want a man who wants to take care of me. I don't want to wear the pants in future relationships. However, this becomes difficult when people suggest going places/doing things that do not interest me. What do you say when someone wants to meet up at The Cheesecake Factory? It's tough because I don't want to derail his plan, but I don't want to eat at The Cheesecake Factory either. My natural instinct is to take over and manhandle the situation so that I don't have to suffer in a chain restaurant, but then another part of me thinks that I should go with the flow and as he gets to know me, he will realise that I don't want to eat certain places/do certain things. The other option is to shoot it down all together. But then if he doesn't have a back up plan it could get awkward.

It is difficult. Relationships are so tenuous in the beginning. I don't want to pass a great person up because he couldn't come up with the perfect date on the first try. And I don't want to manhandle all my dates. And I don't want to go on bad dates. It's a quandary.

Good night